I'm sorry to say that after all the time that we have been promoting a webinar with Seth Hanes (send him mail
), scheduled for today, he decided to back out at the last minute.
He didn't want to be associated with us because of the controversy and because we are apparently sexist.
Quick recap. There was a sexist sounding comment on our Facebook group that was removed. Our ex business partner, Troy Dowding, publicly denounced our company
and twisted the situation to make it look like we are sexist. What followed was a couple of weeks where people came out of the woodwork to call James names, to tell me what I can and cannot write and to lecture and mansplain sexism to us.
We spent most of that time encouraging people who appeared to hate us to leave the group. (What would YOU do?)
When we found out that the comment wasn't even meant to be an insult... but just a question asked out of a place of genuine curiosity, I personally felt at peace with the world, and glad that I made as much of a fuss over it, and "stirred the pot". Because that led to a lot of people sharing amazing stories about their changing perception of female trumpeters.
But no one who publicly attacked us acknowledged that the comment was innocent when we pointed it out to them. Troy just rode off into the sunset on his moral high horse, with no thought given to tarnishing the reputation of an established, respected and well-intentioned business over nothing.
Our "crime"? It was stirring the pot and posting sexist comments as click bait and using the phrase "take a pill"... as in a chill pill... to someone who desperately needed one.
Since this controversy continues to be an issue I wanted to use another sexist comment as click bait. This one came from none other than Troy himself. When he said it I was like, "OMG, really?"
On a different Facebook group, James asked, "Aside from being able to play at an acceptable level, what are some of the qualities that are essential in landing and keeping a gig?"
And Troy said, "Be nice, be a dude, best dressed, fresh haircut..."
I said, "I'm going to have a hard time with the being a dude part."
Another woman said the same thing.
Now, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. And I want to hear the whole story. So I'd like to think that Troy (who stands up for female trumpeters all over the world) didn't literally mean that you have to be a dude to land a gig.
But yet it's right there in the comments. Shouldn't someone delete that???
(I personally don't think so, but that's because I don't lose my mind every time I hear something that might not be PC.)
More likely he meant that you have to be a dude, as in, be a laid back cool guy (er, gal, I mean). The fact that he didn't think to say something gender neutral was probably just an oversight.
The point is that people say things, and often it doesn't come out right. But that doesn't mean we should go around accusing each other of being terrible people.
Unless, of course, you think that using obnoxious phrases like "be a dude" as clickbait makes you a terrible person. Because I take a sick pleasure in doing just that. #sorrynotsorry.
Anyway, for those of you planning on attending the webinar, it is cancelled. You can use that time to practice.
Or you can use that time to work on your website.
I recently made a web page that made it super simple for people to schedule lessons.
It is make it easier for me to line up students. If you think that can help you, I encourage you to copy my idea.
I wrote out all the steps so you can follow along!